Tottenham striker Jermain Defoe has admitted his frustration at a lack of big-game opportunities this season.
The England international, who scored his first Premier League goals of the campaign in Sunday's draw with Wolves, is hoping to play a part against AC Milan tomorrow night.
He is not guaranteed to start, though, and has revealed his slide down the White Hart Lane pecking order has annoyed him.
He told the Daily Mail: "It's been hard. You start to think: 'What am I doing here?' I'm used to playing in big games.
"I've played in big games for my clubs and for my country. It'll be a tough game (against Milan). I hope I'm playing and if I can score and win the game then it'll be great.
"But I remember playing against Charlton (in the FA Cup in January) and scoring two goals, then the next weekend I missed out.
"I was upset about that because once I start scoring I'm confident and I have the feeling I know I'll score in the next game. We played Manchester United and I thought, 'I'm playing', but I didn't start."
Spurs boss Harry Redknapp employed just one striker in the first leg against Milan, with Peter Crouch selected, and scoring the only goal in the San Siro.
