‘I don’t believe in institutions’ – Ruth Wilson dismisses marriage as restrictive and doubts she’ll have kids

The actress reveals why she and her ‘secret’ partner won’t be walking down the aisle or starting a family
Ruth Wilson
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Dominique Hines12 December 2022
The Weekender

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Ruth Wilson has said that marriage is a ‘dogmatic and restrictive institution’.

The actress, 40, who has been dating an American writer, whose identity she has kept a mystery, for years, said: “I believe in connections.

“I’ve got a very strong relationship, and have had for a number of years.

“I believe the value of having someone in your life who understands you and sees you is enormous and I’m so glad I have it. But I don’t believe in institutions.”

Wilson (fourth from left) with His Dark Materials colleagues (L-R) Jane Tranter, Dafne Keen, writer Philip Pullman, and Jack Thorne
PA

She added to The Guardian: "I feel slightly restricted by having to conform to someone else’s idea of what a relationship is, or where you should be at this time in your life.

“It feels dogmatic to me.”

The Surrey-born star joked that she must’ve got her views on marriage from her grandfather, Alexander Wilson – a writer, spy and polygamist – whose life was portrayed in 2018 historical drama Mrs Wilson, in which the actress played her own grandmother.

“Yeah, it’s genetics,” she said. “You know, my grandfather died before I was even born, and my parents have a great marriage. It must have skipped a generation.”

Wilson, who  is returning to BBC’s hit fantasy drama His Dark Materials for Series 3, also said she is reluctant to start a family because she doesn’t agree with the notion that you “can do it all”.

Wilson, pictured in BBC1’s Jane Eyre, said she couldn’t ‘do the career I do with a child’
BBC1

“I think about having children, and I don’t know how I could do the career I do with a child,” she admitted.

“I do question how that’s possible. The travel. The amount of mind time it takes me. I’m not sure how I could do it.

“I think it’s a myth that you can do it all and do it all easily. It’s just not the case – and shouldn’t be, probably.

“It’s a mad world, a wonderful world, and I love it. But it makes those other choices in life difficult.”

Season 3 of His Dark Materials will air on BBC iPlayer on December 18 and weekly on BBC1

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