Amanda Holden has revealed that having therapy after losing a child ‘saved her’ and taught her how to live a ‘good life.’
The Britain’s Got Talent judge, who tragically suffered a miscarriage in 2010 and a stillbirth in 2011, has opened up about recovering from the trauma.
Speaking to Good Housekeeping magazine, she said: “My therapist told me I had no more tools or coping mechanism left.
“She was very good at giving me sentences to say to myself to make me stop panicking about my own mortality.
The 44-year-old added: “I think you have none of these worries unless you’ve got children. If it had just been me and Chris and I’d died, it would have been awful for him but nowhere near as bad as a child losing their mother.
Amanda Holden Good Housekeeping Magazine
“It makes you suddenly think, I have to live. I’ve got to live, but I’ve got to try and live a good, happy life for me too and I think that’s why I faced up to the fact that I needed to speak to somebody.
“It was a really good thing. I’m probably too open but I have no secrets.”
Holden, who struggled with a number of complications with the birth of her second daughter Hollie in 2012, admitted that she isn't allowed to have more children.
She said: “I’m not allowed. I would be dead the next time. And I think Chris would say you can have them but you’re not having them with me.
“I’ve got the two I’m supposed to have. I just had to complete my family to feel like I could be me.”
Read the full interview in the June 2015 issue of Good Housekeeping, on sale May 1, or at goodhousekeeping.co.uk/AmandaHolden.
