Louis Wise on the real meaning of Pride

Pride is more than just flamboyant dressing and cabaret stages. Louis Wise explains why
Revellers enjoy last year's London Pride
Getty Images for Pride In London
Louis Wise4 July 2019

Pride! That thing where you do things you’re really, really not proud of.

Or I do, anyway. My memories are blurry, but I can distantly recall getting sodden in New York in ill-fitting Versace shorts; howling along to Ariana Grande in Amsterdam; and pulling a guy on the nightbus home after a particularly large one in Soho. I can still see his tattoo, a small Chinese symbol on his right foot. In short, I’ve definitely done some ‘outreach’ — right?

My attitude towards Pride has evolved with my feelings about my sexuality. Though it hardly seems feasible if you turn on Netflix these days, there was a time when to be gay wasn’t cool at all. In fact, to my pained and unformed mind, it looked exhausting, isolating and naff — and Pride, with its silly parties blaring out tinny house remixes, seemed to sum it all up. Even when I started going it was an afterthought - literally so, because I’d get the Tube into Soho after watching the Wimbledon Ladies final on telly. Of course, I now see that that was more flaming than anything at the Parade, but I suppose that’s karma for you.

This was the technique I applied to a lot of my gay life, even as I made amazing gay friends. I was too sceptical, or too scared, to get to know the rest of it any deeper. I would down five cans of Stella, hide behind said friends and then — the signature — make wild eyes at someone in the crowd, assuming that if they then had the courage to come up and talk to me, they probably could do the job. And let’s be frank, this approach was also pretty fun. I’m not saying that the absolute essence of Pride is cocking your leg up on the bonnet of a Ford Fiesta and mouthing the chorus of Kelly Rowland’s Commander, but it does come pretty close.

With time, though, I’ve had to understand myself a little more, and in doing so I’ve sussed Pride more too. It’s a way of saying thank you to people who’ve made untold sacrifices for my rights, and still do; a way of celebrating those who do vital work in mental and sexual health, and also a political statement in a world where our leaders might still easily chuck us to the dogs. I’ve also accepted that I absolutely love tinny house. In short, Pride isn’t just a playground, it’s a school. Although, let’s be clear, it’s still the stuff you do behind the bike sheds which is best.

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