7 steps to secure yourself a second date

Dating in London is hard - follow these steps to ensure a second date with your dream guy or girl
Jack Knowles23 August 2016

Dating can be incredibly difficult for even the most confident and suave among us. The concept alone can be quite terrifying; meeting someone you barely know anything about, while trying to win their affections and not come off as a complete weirdo is a difficult feat. Below are seven tips to help secure a second date with your dream guy or girl, for those of us who struggle or don’t know where to start:

1. Be punctual

There is nothing less attractive than a date that shows up late. It reveals so much about a person if they can’t even be bothered to make it to a date that they’ve contributed towards organising. If you say you’re meeting at 7pm, be there at 7pm. Or better yet be there 10 minutes early.

Your chances of a second date will decrease significantly if you turn up late for your first… unless you have a really good reason like an emergency trip to the vet for your beloved cat/dog/chinchilla.

2. Relax

It’s normal to get flustered before meeting someone you are really keen on, but it’s imperative that you try your best to keep your cool. Obviously giving off some nervous vibes is fine, as your date is probably feeling similar, but try not to be a quivering mess.

If you do find yourself stumbling over your words or saying something that could be considered embarrassing, admit to your date that you are slightly nervous. It can actually lead to some flirty banter.

3. Don’t come on too strong

It’s wise not to profess your love to your date when you’ve only just met them. You might feel strongly towards them but try and keep the strong feelings to yourself for now; the first date is not the time to propose.

Compliments are great and everyone wants to hear that they are looking amazing, but it can actually be quite creepy if someone keeps telling you over and over again that you’re looking beautiful, handsome, breath-taking or all of the above.

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It’s also a great idea to refrain from hugging or kissing your date as soon as you arrive. That is a sure fire way to cut the romance short as well as possibly being slapped or arrested.

If the date seems to be going amazingly, a kiss at the end is definitely acceptable.

4. Make your parents proud; be polite

Put into practice what your parents taught you and be polite. If you’re going to be eating during your date, eat with your mouth closed. Don’t talk with your mouth full either, as there is nothing more off putting then having chunks of someone else’s meal sprayed in your general direction.

If your date is speaking, don’t interrupt them; listen and let the conversation flow naturally. Basically, just show your potential new love interest that you are a courteous person.

5. Listen and laugh

Nothing feels as complimentary as someone listening intently to one of your stories or laughing at one of your jokes.

Even if you’ve done some research (thanks to social media) prior to your date and you already know that your date has been to Florida and has swam with dolphins, pretend you don’t know this and enjoy their rendition of the story.

Do not create a really creepy fake laugh; do be genuine but also make your date feel good about themselves. Dates are often nerve-wracking, so laughing and listening will help make them feel at ease in your company.

6. Don’t play games

It’s one thing to appear mysterious and allusive, but don’t play games with someone you are actually interested in having a second date with. It is never fair to play with someone else’s feelings and although a lot of lists like this will say ‘play hard to get’, it’s very easy to play TOO hard to get and you’ll find yourself dateless and alone again.

7. Ask!

It’s difficult to get the courage to ask for a second date but the worst thing that will happen is that the person will say no. It is not the end of the world if this girl or guy didn’t feel the connection you desired; they obviously just weren’t right for you, but maybe the next person will be.

If you don’t want to directly ask for a second date, as the first date comes to an end, just say ‘I had an amazing evening, I would love to do this again’.

It’s also totally socially acceptable in this day and age for a woman to ask out a man, so no excuses.

Jack Knowles is the CEO and founder of dating app, Temptr. Follow Jack on Twitter @jackknowles

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