Top ten ways to get over SATC
It's Saturday morning. You've drunk all the cocktails and champagne (or Cava) from last night and your head's a mess. And then the day gets worse — you realise there's no more SATC! What's a girl (or boy) to do? ...
In light of this tragic inevitability, we at This is London have put together a 10-point action plan to get through the morning after the night before — and how to face a SATC-free future...
1. Wake up slooooowly. Do not attempt to rouse yourself suddenly, for your trauma is great. Preferably remember to put on your silk sleeping-mask before going to bed, a la Carrie, so no-one will see your puffy eyes.
2. Have a long, luxurious bath and wash your (no doubt) smoke-filled hair. Repeat the mantra "I am OK. I am coping. They are not real."
3. Meet up with your similarly SATC-bereaved friends at a trendy brunch venue. Order egg white omelettes in homage to the Manhattan girls.
4. Discuss your sex lives loudly a la Samantha. Make sure you've prepared withering quips in case angry or embarrassed people shoot you evil looks to shut you up.
5. Hit the town for an afternoon of shopping. Buy some Manolos or copycat designer shoes from Topshop or Office.
6. Rummage around your local vintage boutique for some wild Carrie-style clothes. Anything with a bustle, tutu or huge, over-sized motif is preferable.
7. Now dress up in your new outfit and walk down the street wiggling your bum. Make sure you trip over at least once in that cutesey-contrived SJP style.
8. Pop home for a quick tap on your laptop to analyse the day so far. Permissible phrases include: "Meanwhile, uptown...", "I couldn’t help but wonder..." and "Is it time we stopped being ____ and started ____ (insert social trend of choice)."
9. Go out again and stand on the pavement until you get splashed by a bus. Become disappointed when you realise the bus doesn't have your picture on the side.
10. Forget it all and invite your friends back home to watch Sex and the City DVDs. Over. And over. And over again. Whoever said denial was a bad thing?
