The Apprentice: the best of the very worst from 18 years of the boardroom

With the news that the show is returning in January, we looked back at some of its most awkward moments
Lord Sugar in The Apprentice
BBC / Fremantlemedia Limited
Kimberley Bond28 November 2023

Today it was announced that a new season of The Apprentice will return on January 4. Anyone who was feeling the lack of a gaggle of grey-clad wannabes hustling their way around the city in increasingly deranged attempts to create and sell products can breathe a sigh of relief – we'll soon be back to hearing the world’s most ridiculous business-related boasts (“My first word wasn’t mummy, it was money!” Truly dreadful).

The show has a lot to answer for – as well as being responsible for popularising Donald Trump in the States and introducing us all to Katie Hopkins, The Apprentice has arguably perpetuated both boardroom bad manners and the maddeningly ubiquitous hyper-glossy shots of The Shard.

But, it’s also undeniably certified TV gold. After a slump in ratings midway through its 15 series run, the show got back on form in more recent seasons by embracing its more ridiculous elements. No longer does The Apprentice even pretend to be finding Britain’s best business brain; it’s the least obnoxious character that usually walks away with Lord Sugar’s investment.

With Lord Sugar returning, alongside aides Karren Brady and Tim Campbell, and with more chaos on the agenda, here we’ve rounded up the best of the worst from this show’s fine history.

“I am your boss”

Season three of The Apprentice is when the show started to pick up pace, with one of the series’ most iconic moments happening in the second episode.

Posh boy Rory Laing set his team on edge with his stuffy and uptight management style, which particularly irritated teammate Tre Azam. In one fiery exchange, a royally furious Rory gave us this legendary moment where he told Tre: “I AM your boss,” where Tre spat back: “You’re not my boss, you’re the project manager. You’re nothing to me.”

Unsurprisingly, megalomaniac Rory lost the task and was fired by Lord Sugar – who went by the moniker Sir Alan in the earlier seasons before his peerage. But Rory’s legacy lives on, with Apprentice fans still quoting “I am your boss” over a decade later.

The Birthday Party task

Holding a children’s party for profit seems simple enough, but our candidates quickly learned that it was no piece of cake in series 10.

The real task was to woo the parents who would be shelling out big bucks for their little darlings’ special day, but things went awry for David Stevenson, who managed to mess things up massively with his tacky Happy Birthday t-shirts.

The extortionately priced garments went extraordinarily wrong when Stevenson realised the mirror effect of the printing process caused the Happy Birthday message to come out back to front.

To make things worse, the poor quality transfers didn’t stick to the t-shirts properly, meaning the parents refused to pay the extra cost and leaving the team £175 in the red.

It wasn’t smooth sailing for the other team, either, who bought a cake with traces of nuts to a party where the mother had an extreme nut allergy – causing her to miss out on the majority of the bash.

Selling British cheese to the French

We’ve all heard about carrying coals to Newcastle, but The Apprentice managed to outdo the old adage when they flogged (or rather, tried to flog) cheddar cheese to the French back in series three.

Team Stealth (a truly appalling team name even by Apprentice standards) opted for wholesale cheese, which went down like a cup of cold sick to infamous cheese connoisseurs, the French – with the team making a £200 loss.

Project manager Paul Callaghan was fired, with Sugar branding him “a total shambles”.

“Do the French like their children?”

It seems The Apprentice is gunning to make the French hate us, with season seven candidate Susan Ma asking: “Do the French like their children?” when asking about the country’s culture.

Her cultural clanger doesn’t seem to have harmed her – despite being eliminated from the show in the semi-finals, Lord Sugar still chose to invest in her business. Ma’s company, Tropic Skincare, now makes millions, raking in over £41.8 gross profit in the 18 month period before December 2020.

Sandalwood vs cedarwood

Before series five, the vast majority of us would have been in the dark about the precise difference between cedarwood and sandalwood. However, it was eventual winner Yasmina Siadatan’s now legendary costly mix up when making body care products that means fans of the show will never confuse the two.

For those not in the know, cedarwood costs just £26 a kilo, sandalwood is a whopping £1,200 a kilo.

The mistake was pointed out by cheeky Nick Hewer – but only when it was far too late.

I heart my tissues

It was enough to bring a tear to your eye when series four favourites Raef Bjayou and Michael Sophocles made a bizarre advert for a box of tissues. In their clip, Welsh meteorologist Sian Lloyd was cast as a mother wiping the nose of a snotty child. It was odd to say the least - Sugar hated it - but fans of The Apprentice were split.

"We know for a fact that it struck a chord with the public," said Bjayou after leaving the show. "Afterwards we got message after message, not only saying ‘We love your advert!', but also saying: 'Raef and Michael, that advert should be aired!'"

“Look what you’re resting the bloody thing on!”

In this moment from the 2007 series, we saw eventual winner Simon Ambrose throw himself fully into the TV shopping task. Unfortunately, being a salesman on screen did not come naturally to the rather awkward former investment banker.

Tasked with selling a trampoline to viewers watching at home, things went from bad to worse when Simon demonstrated just how easy it was to assemble. He unfortunately lined up the trampoline’s leg against his groin, with hilarious, excruciating results.

Solomon not having a grasp of a business plan

It’s one of the most important parts of The Apprentice – yet it seems series 10 candidate Solomon Akhtar had failed to actually watch any other series of the show.

Instead of producing an actual, viable business plan to present to Lord Sugar, he infamously gave Lord Sugar ‘pictures of sailboats’, as fierce interviewer Claude Littner pointed out. When the interview was cut short, Solomon was so shaken up he failed to even find the exit, instead walking towards the window. Yikes.

It’s Pants, Man!

While Phillip Taylor in the 2009 edition of the show thought he was onto a winner with Pants Man – a “genius” character who was to help flog children’s cereal – he was beaten by the other team’s creation; Captain Squawk.

The Apprentice season four will premiere on the BBC on January 4, 2024

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