Sir Ian's Hanky Twankey

High kicks: Sir Ian McKellen sings during the Europride celebration show at the Royal Albert Hall
10 April 2012
Europride 2006
Royal Albert Hall
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How do you top one of the biggest gay parades in British history? Easy. With one of the longest gay gigs ever staged.

After the celebratory march on Saturday the partying continued last night with a four-hour show culminating in a funky midnight set and a flash of controversy from Sir Elton John.

Compere Stephen Fry opened proceedings and tried to look on the bright side of the World Cup defeat, and was greeted by a deafening cheer. The first guest, spoof country crooner Tina C, delivereda witty, tight set. However it was clear that this was going to be a long night when the second act, forgettable rock band Never The Bride, waded through tedious power ballads.

Some real stars made do with walk-on parts. Jennifer Saunders and Ruby Wax introduced Broadway puppet phenomenon Avenue Q, while Graham Norton did little more than kiss one of the Fuzzy Felt cast.

Sir Ian McKellen was introduced as Widow Twankey, but for his one song looked more like the offspring of Ethel Merman and Shirley Bassey in flame-red wig and shiny frock. Good legs, though.

After the interval Stephen Fry was replaced by Julian Clary and Sandi Toksvig. Clary continued the football theme by explaining that he and his co-host are "often confused for Nancy Dell'Olio and Ronnie Corbett". Though I cannot recall Mrs Sven ever appearing on stage in a black sequinned suit split at the crotch to reveal a spangly blue cod-piece.

The emphasis in the second half was more on music than mirth. Boy George did a spot of gay community service with a reggae-fied version of Fleetwood Mac's Go Your Own Way, wh i le Heather Small gave her M People hit One Night In Heaven the full diva treatment, those paint-stripper vocals scaring the crowd into dancing.

Small was a tough act for stand-up Alan Carr to follow and it did not help that while he was doing some lovely barbs about orange-faced Selfridges assistants a jobsworth was distractingly polishing a grand piano in preparation for the arrival of rock's very own Dame.

After a gushing introduction from Billie-Jean King and David Furnish, Sir Elton quickly got a laugh and an ovation with a scathing attack on the Pope's recent statement that the only true love can be between a man and a woman. "What the f*** would he know about that?" barked Sir Elton, before embarking on a tirade against religion in general, which made his huge crucifix necklace seem an odd fashion statement.

Any mixed messages were forgotten when he started playing. The groovy, muscular Philadelphia Freedom rolled back the years and with the appearance of Kiki Dee for Don't Go Breaking My Heart it was 1976 again, except with gay marriages, tolerance and knighthoods for prominent homosexuals.

Maybe even an England team that could score penalties? We can dream.

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